What I've hoped to never have to do, I have had to do this past week. My 14 week old unborn baby went to be with Jesus a week ago, and this is something I literally did not think would happen to me because I figured that God thought I wouldn't be able to handle something like that. I've proven myself wrong in the last couple of days, and so has God. With His strength I have found the will to move on and the ability to find comfort in the peace only He can give. My heart and mind are at ease knowing my little one is with Him - safe and sound - and one day, I will get to wrap him/her in my arms.
What I hope to never have to do? To never go through this again. Though the healing has been faster with each day, the pain and the emptiness is still there, lingering at the bottom of my heart. I know God will deal with that as well, but the grieving process itself is harder than anything I've ever had to go through. I get a lump in my throat walking by the baby section at Walmart, or seeing someone else's ultra-sound pictures... not because I resent them for carrying their baby longer than I did, but because I wish I could have as well.
There are a lot of things I hope I never have to do in my lifetime, but that is the main one. I would most likely bore you to tears if I proceeded to list all of the things I hope I never have to do.
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